“Mum, it’s me!” — Stop Impersonation Scams with a Family Secret Word
Use a simple passphrase to defeat “new number” messages, voice clones, and urgent payment requests.
When you get an urgent “new number / I’ve lost my phone” message—or even a call that sounds like your loved one—ask for your family secret word immediately. If they stall or get it wrong, end the chat and call their saved number. Even if they get it right, sanity-check the request before doing anything.
A shared secret word buys you time and clarity. Used with a quick callback on a known-safe channel, it defeats most impersonation scams—including convincing AI-cloned voices.
The Secret Word Protocol (built for “lost phone / new number”)
- Agree the phrase securely: do it in person or on a video call; choose something memorable but unguessable (quirky three-word combos work well); rotate it every 6–12 months or after anything suspicious.
- In the moment (text, DM, or call): ask “What’s our family word?” If there’s hesitation, pressure, or no word—end the conversation and you call their saved number (or use a family video call).
- If they do give the word: treat it as passed step one, not a green light. Apply:
- Sense-Check: Does the request make real-world sense?
- Second Check: You initiate contact on a known-safe channel (saved number, family group video, or a third party physically with them).
- If anything feels off, do nothing until you’ve verified directly.
Why this works (even against AI voice clones)
- Crooks rarely know your private passphrase.
- Channel-hopping—you end the chat and call a saved number—breaks most scams.
- Legitimate emergencies can withstand a short delay and a proper callback; scams usually can’t.
Scripts you can copy
- New number text/DM: “Happy to help—quick check: what’s our family word?” (No correct word? End chat → call saved number.)
- Convincing phone call: “You sound stressed—say our family word.” (Stalling? Hang up → call saved number.)
- Pushback (“I can’t! It’s urgent!”): “Our rule is for emergencies. I’m ringing your saved number now.”
- If you genuinely need help: start with it: “Family word thistle-piano-sundae. I need help with…”
Picking a strong phrase
- Avoid anything public (pets, schools, birthdays, teams).
- Use a quirky three-word combo you can recall under stress.
- Prefer saying it aloud; don’t routinely type it.
Red-flag checklist (word or no word)
- Gift cards (iTunes/Apple/Google Play), crypto, or a new payee/account.
- Requests for 2FA codes, passwords, one-time passcodes, or card photos.
- “Don’t call me” + urgency + secrecy.
- Claims from bank/police/HMRC demanding instant payment—hang up and call the official number from their website.
Quick family setup (10 minutes)
- Agree the phrase in person or on a video call.
- Save each other’s numbers; add a family group for “PASS CHECK OK” posts.
- Adopt the rule: “No word? No money, no codes, no info.”
- Run a 60-second drill tonight.
- Add a 6-month calendar reminder to rotate the phrase.
Print-ready reminder
- FAMILY PASS CHECK
- Our word: [write by hand]
- Rule: No word? No money, no codes, no info.
- Verify via: [saved number / family video call]
- Backup contact: [name / number]
- Next rotation: [date]
Bottom line: The secret word gives you a pause and a plan—but your judgement still matters. If the ask is odd (gift cards, codes, crypto), stop and contact your loved one directly on a saved number. No panic, no shortcuts.